A Good Innings

As 55 approaches, I feel the need to reflect on what has been a colourful and indeed eventful innings. A couple of people have said to me recently that I'd lived a very "full" life. Well, yes, I've certainly packed plenty into it so far, and although the catastrophes have been on a mega scale, the highs have been equally brilliant. I've been lucky.
Whenever I've been at my lowest, someone has been there for me - and we can't really ask for more than that. I once had the privilege to work with a lady from Wigan, Doris Baxter. She told me three things I've always remembered:

• That Fate only dishes out to us sh*t that we have the capacity to cope with.
• That if you get ideas above your station, and try to impress those who know you're blagging, you'll stand out like "Liver on a Cake Stand", and
• That magnolia-painted woodchip wallpaper looks like someone's hurled rice pudding at the wall and not washed it off properly.

There's a lot of truth in each tenet - thank you, Doris - I'll never forget you.